Back and Forth

January 1, 2013 § 2 Comments

I have no pictures of the past week or so to share. In truth, they would have mostly been snapshots of cookies and Amedei chocolate bars and homemade cheese, games of Carcassonne (which my brother introduced us to this very Christmas) and Rummikub, and movie theater screens. The pictures would have included church sanctuaries and book pages and rainy puddles obscuring the driveway. My oven and crockpot would have been fully represented. If there had been any pictures of me taken when I wasn’t clad in various versions of pajamas, I might have shared those.

But what I lack in photographic evidence, I more than made up for in memories. I cherish this time of year, especially the time my close family and I (2 parents and one brother) get to enjoy together without work interruptions or reasons to leave the house. The few plans we did make involved spending Christmas Eve night with my Grannie and celebrating with her before retiring to our house in the country (sounds so chic, doesn’t it?) to embrace our lazy sluggishness. Being surrounded by those you love (friends included) and those who love you means the most to me at Christmas and all year round, really.

The year 2012 wasn’t a surprising or terribly trying year for me, but it was one full of changes and shifts that I tried to embrace. I’ve had more jobs in the last year than I’m used to (taxes should be interesting) and I’ve flown more than I’m used to and eaten animals I’m not used to. I’ve met new babies and seen dear friends become wives and said goodbye to salt-of-the-earth men I wish I’d been closer to. I’ve been sad and elated and cried until my throat ached and laughed myself into deeper smile lines. The past months have tested me, stretched me, and taught me. In many ways I do feel more confident, more assured, and even more okay to let lingering questions and doubts ride as I try to make sense of so many facets of life. While sometimes that changes by the day, I am focusing more and more on learning what it really means to be content no matter my circumstances and to trust God and his plan. Looking back at the pictures I did manage to take, the past year seems fuller than I thought it was at the time.

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